Episode 5: Facing the Fear of Being Seen Again: My Body, My Story, and Learning to Love Yourself Beyond the Perfect Image Artwork

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Top Down Heart Open

Episode 5: Facing the Fear of Being Seen Again: My Body, My Story, and Learning to Love Yourself Beyond the Perfect Image

October 31, 2025 • Kimberly Maturin • Season 1 • Episode 5

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Show Summary

Embracing Our True Selves: A Journey to Self-Acceptance

In this heartfelt episode of “Top Down Heart Open”, host Kimberly Maturin delves into her personal struggle with body image and self-acceptance. Sharing a transformative road trip experience with her husband, Kimberly opens up about the emotional challenges of weight gain and the fear of being seen. She emphasizes the importance of showing up as our authentic selves, embracing our current journey, and rejecting the societal pressure for perfection. This episode encourages listeners to love their bodies for what they do, not how they look, and to redefine confidence and visibility. Kimberly invites her audience to join her in a movement towards self-acceptance and real, unfiltered living. The episode concludes with a call to action to stop hiding and start living boldly.

· 00:00 Episode 5 Facing the Fear of Being Seen Again: My Body, My Story, and Learning to Love Yourself Beyond the Perfect Image

· 00:03 Introduction to “Top Down Heart Open”

· 01:06 The Struggle with Self-Image

· 04:24 The Road Trip Realization

· 06:26 Embracing Authenticity

· 10:34 Moving Forward with Confidence

Privacy Policy, Disclaimer, Acknowledgements & Credits, Copyright Information: https://www.podpage.com/top-down-heart-open-1/legal/

Host & Show Info

· Host Name: Kimberly Poirier-Maturin

· About the Host: I’m deeply rooted in my Cajun heritage and cherish any chance to celebrate our culture, food, and traditions. A Jeep enthusiast, and empty nester, I’m embracing the joy of watching my children step into their next stages of life. I enjoy spending meaningful time with family, and I’m launching my next passion project: a podcast focused on storytelling, personal growth, and life’s twists and turns.

· Podcast Website:https://www.podpage.com/top-down-heart-open-1/

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*Privacy Policy, Disclaimer, Acknowledgements & Credits, and Copyright

Transcript

Episode 5 Facing the Fear of Being Seen Again: My Body, My Story, and Learning to Love Yourself Beyond the Perfect Image

[00:00:00]

Introduction to “Top Down Heart Open”

Kimberly Poirier-Maturin: welcome to “Top Down Heart Open” a podcast for women in the magic middle, navigating what is next with the wind in their hair and their hearts wide open. Here we talk about starting over, rediscovering ourselves new, adventurous, and living life on our own terms. It's about finding your voice and living fully, even when it's uncomfortable.

No filters, no perfection, just honest conversations. I'm your host, Kimberly Maturin, and I'm on a journey to rediscover life, love, freedom, and joy. I'm not a celebrity, nor am I an expert. I'm a woman navigating this magic middle, one step at a time, one open road at a time.

If you're ready for real talk, fresh starts and learning how to dream again, you're in the right place because life isn't over. It's just changing and so are we. I'm so glad you're [00:01:00] here. Buckle up. The next chapter is waiting.

The Struggle with Self-Image

Kimberly Poirier-Maturin: Welcome back to “Top Down Heart Open” episode five, the Space where we talk about the real unfiltered parts of growth, womanhood, and becoming who we are. Today's episode is a personal one and one I'm ready to say out loud.

You know, I've always said I'd be a hundred percent real with you, and honestly, I thought I was, but recently my husband and I took a trip, and something hit me hard.

I realized I've actually been lying to you.

Not on purpose but still lying. See, ever since I hit this stage of life where hormones start to change, my body's been changing too. There's been some weight gain. It's been tough, really tough to keep under control, frustrating and emotional. On that trip I found myself hiding from the camera. I didn't want to take [00:02:00] pictures, and then it hit me. How can I come on this podcast and say I'm being real when I'm still hiding? So many of us hide the parts of ourselves, the everyday moments, the parts we judge most. If you've ever felt invisible, judged, or uncomfortable in your own skin, I want you to know you're not alone.

This conversation is for us today. I want to talk about what it really means to show up even when it's scary,

It happens quietly.

Kimberly Poirier-Maturin: you stop taking photos, you decline the invite. You say maybe next time. And then one day you realized you've built a life where you've disappeared from your own story. For me, it started with small choices.

I'd only post photos that were perfectly lit, perfectly posed, taken by someone else. I'd scroll through my camera roll, [00:03:00] deleting every candid shot. ' Cause I didn't like what I saw. At some point I stopped uploading videos altogether, and it wasn't cause I didn't have something to say. It was because I didn't want people to see me.

I told myself I'd start showing up again once I looked better, once I lost the weight, once I felt a little more like me, but that version of me just kept moving further and further away. When was the last time you allowed yourself to be seen?

Truly seen? Without editing and without apology. Here's the truth. I've been afraid of being seen because my body's changed and I didn't know how to make peace with that. I've gained weight, I've tried to change it, and honestly, even that thing, everyone says, works didn't work for me.

So many of us feel stuck, are frustrated when our bodies don't match our expectations. [00:04:00] It's depressing when you try so hard, when you follow the plan, eat right, take the shots, do everything, and your body still doesn't cooperate. It makes you feel like you're failing at something as basic as being yourself.

It is exhausting and it's isolating.

I didn't realize how afraid I was of being seen until I started avoiding it.

The Road Trip Realization

Kimberly Poirier-Maturin: You see my husband and I took a trip, a long road trip from New Orleans to Miami. We made 12 stops along the way, exploring little towns, beaches, restaurants. Moments that were supposed to be beautiful, spontaneous, and full of joy.

After which we went from Miami, flew to Denver, then back home to New Orleans. It should have been a memory I'd want to capture forever, but I didn't. My husband though, was so excited. He kept saying, let's take a selfie. Let's capture this. [00:05:00] He wanted to document every moment the stops, the sunsets, the smiles.

I caught myself hiding from the camera, avoiding photos, and I found myself shrinking away. Every time I saw a photo, I just felt miserable. All I could see was the weight gain, the tiredness, the flaws, the reflection of someone I didn't want to face. He saw love. I saw loss. Somewhere between those miles. I realized how much of my life I've spent editing myself out of my own story,

Kimberly Poirier-Maturin: By the time we got home, my son picked us up in the Jeep.

As soon as I saw it, waiting there at the airport, headlights glowing, like a familiar smile. I exhaled for the first time in days. There was just something about that moment, about seeing something that felt like me Again, the trip was beautiful and [00:06:00] we totally rocked that rental minivan. It had space, comfort and a lot of laughter, but it wasn't the Jeep

When I walked up to it, I tapped a fender and I said, “I missed you”. My husband and son laughed teasing me that I had said it to the Jeep before I said it to my son. But honestly, it wasn't about the Jeep. It was about me realizing how much I'd missed myself, and that moment hit me.

Embracing Authenticity

Kimberly Poirier-Maturin: This is enough, this body, this season, this version of me.

It's enough. That simple, silly moment. Touching metal, breathing out, being home reminded me that I'm still here. Still me, still worth being seen. And if I keep waiting to look a certain way before I allow myself to be in the picture, I'll keep missing the moments that matter the most. Maybe that's what this journey is really about. Not becoming who I used to be, [00:07:00] but being brave enough to be seen as who I am right now. None of us are truly alone we all hide from parts of ourselves sometimes, but when we allow ourselves to be seen even a little, we're showing up, not just for us.

We're showing up for everyone who feels the same. But here's the shift that's slowly, painfully happening for me. My body isn't betraying me, it's protecting me. It's been through stress. Hormones, sleepless nights, motherhood, exhaustion, and expectation. This body has shown up when I wanted to disappear. It's carried me through grief, anxiety, joy, and healing.

And maybe that's what being seen again really means. Not waiting until we fix ourselves but daring to show up in progress [00:08:00] because this, Right now, is my body story, not the before, not the after, just the truth in between. If you've avoided photos or flinched at candid shots or held your breath, when someone tagged you in a memory, I get it.

I see you. You're not alone. We live in a world that tells us our worth depends on our appearance on being perfect, filtered, and effortless. But learning to love yourself isn't about getting back to who you were. It's about embracing who you're becoming.

So today that ends, I'm done hiding. I'm choosing to show up, fully present, fully human, and still learning to love this body exactly where it's at.

Here's what I'm learning.

Show up anyway. Take the picture, post the video, let [00:09:00] yourself exist in this frame.

Speak kindly. Talk to yourself, the way you talk to your daughter or your best friend. Focus on function. Thank your body for what it does, not how it looks. Redefine confidence. It's not about perfection; it's about permission let go of comparison. You cannot heal while measuring your journey against someone else's highlight reel. The moment we stop hiding, we give others permission to do the same. Our visibility becomes a kind of courage. Not loud, but steady and real. Remember this, the people who truly, truly love us aren't waiting for us to be smaller.

They're waiting for us to show up. If you've been avoiding being seen because of your body, your scars, your story. Your flaws are your past. You don't have to wait until you're [00:10:00] better to show up. You don't need a perfect version of yourself. Being seen isn't easy. It means showing up with all of your flaws, stories, our moments, even the ones we've hidden away.

Take a deep breath, guys. Show up for yourself. Let yourself be seen. We owe it to ourselves.

Thank you for spending time with me today. This one came from a very raw place, but I know someone out there needed it. Maybe that's someone is you.

Moving Forward with Confidence

Kimberly Poirier-Maturin: Now for the exciting part, the top down hard open podcast is live and growing. Visit our new website, fill out the contact form to join our email list and stay updated. You can catch the latest episodes and all of our past ones plus; you can rate and review the podcast to help us keep expanding. We only grow with your help. Every listen, share, message and mention means more than [00:11:00] you know. If this episode resonated, share it with a friend who's struggling to be seen again. And if you're ready, post the photo, the unfiltered one. Tag me at top down hard, open, and use the hashtag seen as I am. Because this is the season we stop hiding. Be gentle with yourself. You are allowed to be seen, loved, and real.

and before I close today, I want to thank my husband. You keep me grounded, motivated and grateful. Thank you for a wonderful trip. I look forward to many more to come. I want to thank you all for listening

from small steps to Big Growth. Thank you for being part of this journey.

So, wherever you are today, take a deep breath. Remember, it's never too late to rediscover yourself, to dream new dreams and to live the life you are meant for. Take a deep breath, [00:12:00] roll those windows down and keep your heart open. You are exactly where you're meant to be. This is our road now, and we don't have to drive it alone.

Thank you so much for listening today. Until next time.